And Then Summer Happened

The last time I sat down to write here, it was April. I was bemoaning the return of winter weather which was hanging on longer than anyone wanted it to, spring was taking its sweet time getting here, and I was looking ahead to summer, the long days, the warmth, the green, so much baseball, and the evenings that seem to stretch on forever.

It seems I got caught up in end of school year busy as the days grew warmer and we spent more time outside of the house than in, soaking up those warm sunshine rays that I love so much, and feeling like we were coming ALIVE again.

And then summer came. (HOORAY!!) And the ambition I had for writing more frequently fell to the wayside. (pretty much on the daily)

Not intentionally. It wasn’t a decision to take the summer off from the blog. Life just got full. The GOOD kind of full. The kind where the days begin early and somehow it’s nearly dark before you realize another one has passed. Our days were full of baseball practices and games, travel tournaments, volleyball practices and games, family visits, pool parties and spending the downtime floating in the pool. There were kids and pets and sleepovers and sunshine and places to go. 

After vowing to take more photos, I did. Though somewhere in there I decided that I took photos because I wanted to remember something, not because I needed something to post. I loved teaching the kids how to use the camera and get good photos too. Maybe my love of photography rubbed off a little bit.

There were ordinary days that didn’t feel particularly important while I was living them but already feel different now that they’re behind me.

I kept thinking I’d come back here and write about it.

Tomorrow. Next week. When things slow down. When I can catch my breath. Isn’t that how we think about a lot of things.

But somewhere along the way, I stopped trying so hard to capture summer and simply LIVED it. It became intentional. A slow down. “Savoring Summer” became my daily mantra.

And maybe that’s exactly what I needed. I honestly really feel that now. I feel so much more at ease. I’ve spent so many seasons in the hustle, in the “have to”, in the needing to be something for someone else more than for me. I’m so grateful I took that time away from the computer, social media, and from feeling like I needed to be more when I really just needed to believe in being less. (more on that another day)

And here we are today, the fall equinox, another turn of another season. And while I’m so sad to be losing all that I love about summer, there is something about that turn that feels especially meaningful to me this year.

Fall has always felt like a season of change, but maybe it’s also a season of gathering.

We gather what grew.

We notice what we’re grateful for.

We decide what we want to carry with us and what we’re ready to let fall away.

I’ve spent so much time looking toward the next thing. The next season. The next goal. The next version of myself. But this year I’ve been trying to practice something different.

TO SAVOR.

To notice the tiny details while I’m still inside them instead of realizing later how much they meant.

And this summer gave me plenty to notice.

I may not have written the stories while they were happening, but I lived them. I collected photographs and memories, long days and little moments. I paid attention. And now, as the kids are back in school, our busy season has lessened, and the light begins to soften while the days grow shorter, I find myself wanting to gather them all up.

Maybe that’s what this season is asking of me.

Not to start over, or get back in a groove, or make up for lost time, or rush headfirst into another list of things I should be doing.

Instead, just to reorient myself.

To take what summer gave me (because I feel so full!),  leave behind what I no longer need, and turn toward whatever comes next.

I’ll share some of those memories one day soon. Hang in there with me.